The zone of discomfort: the secret friend of procrastination, which prevents us from starting important things. Comfort zone - what is it

". All of them are devoted to the comfort zone of a person - the conditions that are familiar and comfortable for him, the established pace and lifestyle, as well as why it is important to be able to get out of this zone, and how to do it.

But at the same time, we cannot consider this topic only from one side, because the zone of personal comfort is vital for each of us. It serves as a space where we can always retire, where we will always feel safe. And today we will consider the personal comfort zone from this point of view, and also tell you how to save your personal space from the encroachment of other people and the impact of negative external factors.

Personal comfort zone and its specifics

We all live in a society and we have to constantly interact with people. It is for this reason that each of us needs a certain space where we can always be alone with ourselves, where we will feel calm and as free as possible, where we will not be disturbed, where we will be outside of other people's manipulations. This space is called the zone of personal comfort, and it is a prerequisite for the harmonious life and natural functioning of the psyche of any person.

Have you ever felt uncomfortable in a crowd of people? Have you ever felt annoyed when someone came very close to you? Did you feel uncomfortable when someone took something from your things or, for example, took your workplace or favorite chair at home?

We think that most people are familiar with such situations. And if you noticed something similar in yourself, you should know that all this is completely natural, because the desire to keep a distance and protect your personal space is inherent in the very nature of man.

On an unconscious level, we strive to protect our Self from any intrusions, and what matters to us, for example, clothes, a phone, a computer or a car, is always perceived by us as a component of our individuality, which no one has the right to encroach on.

The readiness to share one's comfort zone with other people always depends on a person's lifestyle and his social status. We have some interesting data on this topic: the staff of the Research Center for Psychoanalysis at Moscow State University conducted research, as a result of which it turned out that the personal space of Muscovites is 5 times smaller than that of residents of provincial cities.

Psychologist Maya Lagutina says that residents of large cities have to pay for comfort with peace of mind. Not everyone is able to calmly perceive systematic violations of their comfort zone, which is why many begin to psychologically distance themselves from the people around.

Certain features of the perception of personal space are also found in people with different living conditions. For example, the personal space of people living in communal apartments is so small that they have practically no understanding of what this space can be at all. It is very comfortable for such people to stand in the same queues or ride buses, and the crowd of people is almost a guarantee of security for them.

Different nations also perceive space differently. For example, Europeans have an intimate zone of about 25 cm, Americans have 50 cm, and representatives of Eastern nations can comfortably communicate with strangers at such a distance, which is completely unacceptable for Europeans, including residents of Russia. These differences, by the way, often cause misunderstanding and even conflict situations between people of different nationalities.

However, let's move away from statistics and talk in more detail about what the boundaries of personal space are, because this is very important for understanding the psychology of protecting the personal comfort zone. But first, take a few minutes to watch this short video, where an etiquette specialist talks about personal space.

The boundaries of personal space

The personal space of each person includes two components - physical and psychological. If we say, then the boundaries of the personal comfort zone will be determined by the degree of familiarity with those with whom we communicate, and the level of trust in him. Based on this, there are several zones of personal space:

Intimate area. It is approximately 15 to 45 cm (less than an outstretched arm). Designed to communicate with the closest people: relatives, friends. When this zone is violated by an outsider, anxiety and psychological discomfort often occur. The pressure may jump and the pulse quickens.
Personal zone. It is approximately from 50 cm to 1.5 m. Designed for communication with familiar people: colleagues, partners, classmates, friends. Allows communication not only on the topic of affairs and tasks, but also about personal life.
social zone. It is approximately from 1.5 to 4 m. Designed for contacts with strangers, contributes to a sense of psychological security. It is not recommended to break it, because. the reaction of other people to this can be very different - from misunderstanding to fear.
public area. Is more than 4m. Designed for communication with numerous groups of people and audiences, suitable for business meetings, meetings, seminars, lectures, trainings, etc.

If it comes to the psychological component of the personal comfort zone, then it is a variable, and it is influenced by the individual characteristics of each individual person. Psychological boundaries can be affected by the following indicators:

. As you know, there are extroverts and introverts. The former are open and can easily share their personal space with others, even strangers. Due to the peculiarities of their character, they themselves often violate the comfort zone of those with whom they communicate. Introverts, on the other hand, are more closed, and they are more comfortable keeping their distance from people. They do not like it when their personal space is violated, and they themselves do not invade the space of others.
Self-confidence level. Confident people almost never violate other people's privacy (don't get too close, don't check texts and emails of husbands and wives, keep tact in communication, etc.). Insecure, on the contrary, more often violate the comfort zone of others, and also allow intrusion into their own zone, being unable to defend themselves psychologically.
Place of residence. People living in big cities and exposed to social stress (pressure of a large number of people) have narrower boundaries of personal space. In other words, in order to feel comfortable, they need more "free" space around them. And people living in small towns, where almost everyone knows each other, the boundaries of personal space are wider, and they perceive more calmly when someone is too close to them.
A family. There are families where the concept of personal space is almost completely absent. Being brought up in such conditions, people get used to frank communication, as a result of which the boundaries of their personal space are wider. But in some cases, people who grew up in such families can casually invade the space of others, completely ignoring them. There are families where it is customary to observe etiquette and a sense of tact. Children from such families have narrower boundaries of the personal comfort zone, they will never “without demand” violate the personal space of others.
culture. Cultural and national characteristics also seriously affect the boundaries of personal space. For example, in eastern and some Asian countries it is permissible to communicate, being almost close to the interlocutor. In European countries and, for example, in the USA, this will be considered the height of indecency, because. traditions and culture are completely different there.

It is important to note that the invasion of personal space is far from always an indicator that a psychological attack is being made on you. So, a person may be a representative of a different culture or simply have no idea what a personal comfort zone is. But there are also people who violate these boundaries intentionally, pursuing the goal of asserting themselves, suppressing, insulting, spoiling the mood, showing who is the "master" here, etc.

Violation of personal space can be expressed in different forms. Some come too close or start talking on inappropriate topics, others calmly take other people's things and litter someone else's workplace, others can grab their sleeves or put their hands on their shoulders, start waving their arms or hang menacingly over the table. Lots of options.

But it doesn’t matter if someone unknowingly violates your personal comfort zone or deliberately wants to piss you off or scare you, you must be able to protect yourself and your personal space. While most of the time you will be subconsciously striving to maintain boundaries, there are a few effective techniques that can help you do this more successfully.

How to prevent personal space being violated

The issue of defining and maintaining the boundaries of the personal comfort zone is of great importance, because. our psychological comfort and safety depend on it. The ability to provide such protection can not only give us peace of mind when we are riding with a stranger in an elevator or squeezed into a crowded subway car during rush hour, but also protect us from the "tricks" of pickpockets, "hypnotists", frotterists and other lovers of large crowds of people.

If someone unfamiliar is trying to invade your personal or intimate area, take a defensive posture. Take a couple of steps back, cross your arms over your chest, push one leg forward. Your opponent will not only see, but also non-verbally feel that you do not want to let him close to you.
When someone tries to put pressure on you, invading your personal space, you can use a counterattack. Come closer, put your hands on your hips or waist, tilt your body forward a little, confidently look your opponent in the eyes and ask what he needs. Most likely, the person himself will hasten to retire.
If someone at work tries to disturb your comfort zone by constantly putting something on your desk or sitting in your chair, create natural barriers. You can put folders around the edges of the table, put a few books and even hang a small poster on the wall. The more personalized your workplace is, the less willing other people will be to encroach on it.
When you are in a crowd of people, never fuss or rush. Move away from the main flow, go a little slower or faster. If this is not possible, grab your things with both hands and carry them in front of you. This will allow you to get some extra space that no one can squeeze into.
Do not forget what other people need, including even those closest to you. The word "no" automatically indicates that you have the right to make choices and decide what to accept and what not. And this in itself determines the boundaries of your personal space psychologically.
Be mindful of your time. You should always have at least a few hours a day where you do your hobbies and things that interest you. Self-realization is in your own power, and time “for yourself” allows you to streamline your thoughts. Invading the personal space of a confident person with order in his head is very difficult.
If we are talking about family relationships, then be sure to create a corner in the house for yourself - where there will be something that belongs to you personally, and where no one but you has access. The psychological climate in the family and even harmony in relationships depend on the presence in the house of one's own physical space for oneself and the household.
When you're interacting with someone and you notice that the person is getting too close to you, tell them in plain text to keep their distance. Explain that you are uncomfortable when someone invades your personal comfort zone, and also point out that the optimal distance contributes to a fruitful dialogue.
Do not discuss personal problems with strangers. Confidential conversations can be conducted only with those whom you trust. Otherwise, the opponent can easily violate your personal space by using personal information against you - something that can hurt you and unsettle you.
Some people violate the boundaries of personal space intentionally - to provoke. If you encounter this behavior, try not to respond to provocations. Strive to maintain calm and self-control, increase the distance, remain indifferent (as long as possible, at least).
When you want to isolate yourself from people in public places, use a simple trick: take a book or newspaper (smartphone or tablet) and immerse yourself in reading. This will create both a visual and psychological barrier between you and those around you. This trick, by the way, is very convenient to use in public transport.
When communicating with strangers, prevent the possibility of violating the boundaries of personal space in advance. Never shorten the physical and psychological distance before you get to know the person well enough. Otherwise, you risk being, firstly, misunderstood (your actions may be misinterpreted), and secondly, become a victim of violations of boundaries by the opponent.

And a few more recommendations of a psychological nature. Violation of the personal comfort zone often occurs through pressure on or pity, familiar communication or unreasonable criticism. To protect yourself from this, you need to be able to apply methods of psychological protection, such as:

do not take on unnecessary responsibility;
do not make unnecessary promises;
do not let yourself be made a scapegoat;
not try to be good to everyone and everyone;
use .

However, in life it often happens that it simply does not work to stay away from people, and strangers literally invade our personal space with their views, conversations and bodies. But even here we can influence the situation - soften these intrusions and make them less annoying and unpleasant for ourselves. There are also several ways to do this:

To protect yourself from others, you can set clear boundaries. For example, in the subway or bus, you can stand with your back - the most vulnerable part of the body - against the wall of the car, put a bag, backpack or umbrella between you and your fellow travelers. And if someone begins to stare at you, do not hesitate to look straight into his eyes for a few seconds, and then continue to go about your business.
If people begin to restrict your freedom of movement or peace of mind (in the same transport or somewhere in a cinema or shopping center), put on headphones. It is desirable, however, that they be large, and not inconspicuous liners. In principle, you can not even turn on the player itself. The main thing is to create a visual obstacle to contact. If you want to abstract from what is happening as much as possible, feel free to turn on the music, but do not forget to remain attentive to what is happening around.
When you notice that a person in a public place still continues to violate the boundaries of your personal space, you can use a book or newspaper in a more “radical” way - by placing an edge and resting between yourself and the violator of your boundaries. Similarly, it is easy to use a backpack, an umbrella, a bag. But make sure that no one tries to get into the pocket of a bag or backpack.
Finally, if you have to make your way through a crowd of people, wrap your arms around the bottom of your bag or backpack in front of you and walk forward. This gesture will look quite natural, but at the same time, your elbows will be pointing forward, causing people to try to get out of your way. In extreme cases (if there is nothing at hand), you can cross your arms in front of you, which will act on others in much the same way.

These tips are enough to start mastering the techniques of maintaining the boundaries of personal space. Of course, there are many nuances here, especially those related to the protection of psychological boundaries, and in particular the preservation of personal space in the family and relationships, but we will consider these issues in one of the future articles.

In conclusion, we only add that you should not only be able to maintain your personal space, but also keep your distance yourself. Each person has his own personal comfort zone, and you can find out how big or small it is only by getting to know the person himself closer. Therefore, in communication, follow the golden rule: approaching people, both physically and psychologically, must be done step by step.

The closer you know someone, the warmer your relationship, the more you can close the distance. Remember that the zone of personal comfort is a zone of peace and security of the individual. Do not allow anyone to violate your boundaries, and do not violate others yourself. This will allow you to bring a little more harmony and understanding into life and communication.

Now take a break from reading and listen to what psychologist Olga Amelianenko says about personal space. We think that from this conversation you can also learn something interesting for yourself.

For a person, a sense of security is one of the important components of life. Comfort zone - painstakingly building relationships with the outside world, phenomena, environment in accordance with their internal ideas about comfort, security and stability.

What is a comfort zone?

People build their lives in such a way that everything becomes clear and familiar. Physiological (vital) needs, a sense of security, love and belonging to any social group - this is all that is needed for most people. This is how a stable comfort zone is formed - a certain area of \u200b\u200bthe living space where everything is habitually familiar to a person and functions in such a way that no effort is needed - life situations occur almost automatically: routes, stereotypical behavior, home, family, work.

What is included in the comfort zone for different people:

inner world with attitudes and beliefs;
personal space;
day, painted by hours and minutes;
a cup of coffee in the morning with toast;
morning exercises or jogging;
livelihoods within their area in the city;
purchases in the same stores;
habitual work for several years;
competence in their field;
taste preferences;
daily activities and rituals.

Comfort zone in psychology

To the question: what is a comfort zone in psychology, psychologists answer that it is a human resource that has been formed thanks to stable neural connections. As a result, automatic skills are formed that do not require the expenditure of energy, as happened in the initial stages, when certain efforts were required. People carefully protect the formed patterns of life, and are afraid to destroy their cozy little world.

Communication comfort zone

Personal space is necessary for health and successful life. A person feels more secure when the boundaries of interaction with other people are respected. Comfort zones in communication in classical psychology are usually divided into 4 radii:

Intimate area- on average up to 45 cm, arm's length distance. Carefully guarded space by a person, the intrusion into which causes tangible anxiety, anxiety and is perceived as an encroachment. In this zone, sexual partners and relatives are comfortably perceived. The boundaries of intimacy are often violated when traveling on public transport, in cinemas, and at events with a large crowd of people.
Personal (personal) zone - up to 1.2 m. Parties, social events and people with whom a superficial acquaintance.
social zone- up to 3.5 m. a person prefers to keep a distance with unfamiliar people.
public area- from 3.5 m. In public places, free space is important for a person.

Relationship comfort zone

The relationship of two loving people is developing rapidly: over time, they are recognized, passions subside, a partner is accepted with all his features and quirks. The comfort zone of a person expands, and partners in many ways cease to be ashamed of each other. Signs that the relationship has entered the comfort zone will be trust and the disappearance of anxiety associated with "how do I look in his / her eyes?".

What is the comfort zone?

The zone of one's own comfort is a necessary phenomenon for every individual. What a person accumulates during his life: material wealth, spiritual values, ties with society, personal relationships - all this is a positive aspect that contains support and keeps a person afloat. The negative aspect of the personal comfort zone will be process stagnation or stagnation.

Why step out of your comfort zone?

What happens when people get stuck in their “oasis” for a long time, and why is it important to overcome fears and get out of familiar, comfortable conditions? Not for everyone, going beyond is relevant, a person, as part of nature and the universe, strives from chaos to peace. To understand “why?”, the individual must ask himself: “What is so useful outside the comfort zone that will bring me tangible benefits?”. Reasons why a person may leave the comfort zone:

lack of meaning in life;
the presence of a specific goal and;
the need for a complete change of impressions;
life circumstances are built in such a way that it is no longer possible to live as before;
perspective of personal growth: education, career;
awareness of the fact that the constant presence in the comfort zone leads to degradation and emotional stupefaction.

How to get out of the comfort zone?

Leaving the comfort zone is fraught with risks and stresses - the ancient defense mechanisms of "uncharted territory" are activated. You need to understand this and respect the body, which takes care of the owner so much, gradualness is important in everything. Conventionally, there are two exit paths: a hard one, which life itself sets before a person (traumatic, tragic situations) and a conscious exit, when a person decides to exit. There are no specific actions, each person builds them himself, but there are general recommendations of psychologists:

A clear awareness by a person of the boundaries beyond which he is afraid to go.
Search for the main reasons that cause resistance and prevent the implementation of the plan.
The implementation of the exit, by immersion in new cases and situations that cause discomfort.

This will help simple methods:

jump with a parachute;
come to meet first;
for the settled - to start traveling;
learn a foreign language;
leave low-paid and unworthy jobs;
workout;
change the daily routine;
move to another city, country;
learn a new profession;
start taking initiative at work.

How to expand your comfort zone?

The comfort zone is not a static phenomenon. Expansion occurs if a person is engaged in activities that are new to him for some time, performs unfamiliar actions, which soon become habitual and fit into his field of life. Only when going beyond the boundaries of ordinary boundaries, the zone of personal comfort expands. At this stage, psychologists advise:

Start small, gradually increase the volume of actions.
A new action should become a habit and be fixed for at least 21 days (persistent fixation ≈ 90 days).
Provide yourself with the support of friends - motivation and enthusiasm dry up, and close people are a source for maintaining the intention to move on.
Fix the slightest results of changes, and compare yourself "current" with yourself "yesterday".

Comfort zone books

Getting out of the comfort zone is the only way of development for a person who realizes that life is in motion. How to overcome the comfort zone, the reader learns from books:

How to get out of your comfort zone. Guide to personal effectiveness. M. Anderson- The author of the book compares the comfort zone with the Bermuda Triangle, in which everything disappears: ambitions, dreams.
“Get out of your comfort zone. Change your life. 21 Methods for Improving Personal Efficiency. B. Tracy- the American speaker shares his experience of "eating frogs" - this is how he calls situations of leaving the comfort zone.
"To hell with all of it! Take it and do it! R. Branson- the slogan of the book "To live is to try new things!". A brand person teaches how to take everything from life and succeed in the new.
"Try it - it will work! When was the last time you did something for the first time?” S. Godin- the author generously shares his tricks in overcoming fears of undertakings, inspires to great things.
"Light the fire! Sincere advice for those who are looking for their own path "D. Laporte- a book for women who live an ordinary life and have forgotten about their desires.

“Comfort Zone” sounds quite pleasant and natural, but the bottom line is that if a person is stuck in his own comfort zone, he has no chance to somehow change and improve his life! And so it will be until he learns to go beyond his comfort zone, overcoming his own internal limitations.

In this article, we will consider three questions:

What is a comfort zone?
What does the comfort zone imply, that is, what do you expect from your life if you live it exclusively in the comfort zone?
What creates your comfort zone and does not allow you to leave it?

And in the second part of this article we will consider the question - How to get out of the Comfort Zone?

What is the Comfort Zone

Comfort zone - this is a limited living space of a person + a habitual and most often settled way of life.

comfort zone space a person considers known and safe for himself. That is, this space consists of well-trodden paths and already studied cases that do not involve overcoming any fears, complexes and mastering something new and unknown.

Habitual lifestyle - a set of habits (habitual daily activities) and the usual distribution of life time, when a person does not allocate time for something new, important, which can qualitatively improve his life.

What is life in the comfort zone?

Life in a rut, in a “comfortable”, but in a rut, according to some familiar pattern, for example, “home-work-life” and without changes, for decades the same thing.
Communication with the same people, from some one class, to which he is accustomed. Without new acquaintances, relationships and opportunities. But new relationships are always new impressions, connections and opportunities according to fate.
One job for many years, and when it's not your favorite job, it's generally sad. Dependence on your comfort zone, most often, deprives a person of career growth and promotion, because this implies the exit of their very zone.
Approximately the same financial situation, without the growth of financial opportunities. In the vast majority of cases, to increase your income, you need to leave your comfort zone and start doing something that you have never done before.
It also means that a person will have practically no new impressions and joys in life, that his life will not change qualitatively if he does not leave his comfort zone and he himself will never become stronger and more influential than he is now. As the saying goes, “as you were born, so you will die”.
Such a person will never overcome his inner fears and complexes that prevent him from starting a new, richer, more interesting life, and a happy life. This means that internal problems will only accumulate throughout life, resulting in stress, negative emotions, growing dissatisfaction and related diseases.

What is outside the Comfort Zone?

Those who are afraid to step out of their comfort zone subconsciously believe that there is danger, trouble, and even death outside of it. But it's not! Outside the comfort zone there is a huge interesting world and thousands of opportunities for new goals and achievements, for new victories, acquaintances and joys.

All the best in your life that you can think of is not in your comfort zone, but outside it!

That's why I want to say “go and get it, what are you waiting for?”, but it wasn’t there, because not every person can get out of his comfort zone, which is nothing more than a bunch of internal walls and restrictions erected by a person with his own fears, complexes and weaknesses (, etc.).

What creates the Comfort Zone and keeps you from leaving it?

At first glance, it seems that the comfort zone is created by the usual way of life, the desire for some kind of stability and the banal desire for comfort, but this is not entirely true. Indeed, in most cases, a person wants much more than he has on this moment, but for some reason he still does not dare to leave his comfort zone, for the sake of all that he dreams of.

Why?There are several reasons here:

For many people, a tit in the hand is more precious than a pie in the sky, that is, they are afraid to risk little in order to get more. But the most interesting thing is that very often you don’t need to risk anything at all! So, what are the real reasons:

1. Fear! something new, unknown. Fear of entering some area, a zone in which a person is not knowledgeable or an expert. Fear that it will not be possible to foresee and foresee everything. Fear that you will have to learn something from scratch, make mistakes, fail, and this can be unpleasant. Always remember the truth “Everything that you are afraid of will always be unattainable for you, closed and inaccessible! And so it will be until you conquer your fear!”

2. Internal complexes! Most often, it is internal and, which, when in contact with the unknown, always makes a person feel uncomfortable. That is, if a person is not confident in himself, he hardly manages to overcome internal limitations and leave the comfort zone.

3. Laziness! Normal - spiritual and physical. Some are too lazy to think, make new decisions, work on themselves in order to change something in their lives. Others, even if they understand that nothing in their life can be changed without action, they are still too lazy to do something, too lazy to move their body, their thoughts and everything else.

This also includes miserable excuses that cover up banal laziness, such as “I have enough”, “Everything suits me in my life”, “I don’t need much”, etc. As a rule, it is with such excuses that a person tries to cover up his deep dissatisfaction and the complex of a loser, who is an ordinary lazy person.

4. Illusions and Irresponsibility! So many people prefer to feed themselves with the illusion that someday, in one magical moment, when the planets line up in a certain way, their whole life will somehow miraculously change itself and everything will be wonderful. Such people are waiting for the bitterness of disappointment! This is how irresponsible people think, who do not want to admit that their whole life is 100% the fruit of only their own decisions, efforts and actions. This is called for yourself and your Destiny.

And about what you need to do to learn how to get out of your comfort zone - read the continuation of the article.

One of the really effective ways to get out of the comfort zone is individual work with, which will help you quickly identify and remove the causes of internal restrictions. If you decide for yourself that you want to work with a mentor -!

Also read

Do you know that according to statistics, 99% of people who live in a comfortable world created by themselves will never achieve anything more? Why? Simply because such a cozy, sweet, protected and safe comfort zone is fraught with the main danger - habit, routine and degradation of the individual.

Yes Yes exactly. Even those people who have reached a high position, have achieved the fulfillment of their important desires and, it would seem, have achieved everything one can dream of - they are constantly looking for new ways of development. They break stereotypes and step out of their comfort zone. And, believe me, it is much more difficult for them to do this than for you - they have more to lose.

What is a comfort zone and how to get out of it, I will tell you.

What is a person's comfort zone

This definition refers to the little world that you have created for yourself, which completely suits you and is not fraught with surprises and dangers. You know for sure that tomorrow will be a new day, you will wake up at 6 in the morning, go to work after working, return home, cook dinner and watch your favorite series. Then - to sleep and in the morning all over again.

From cataclysms - a disease can happen or you illiterately manage money and sit for several days without food. On weekends - theater, nature, meeting with friends ... The same thing, in a circle, annoying, but very familiar, and therefore safe.

The dangers of the comfort zone

Danger one

If you arrange a relaxing massage for a person, he will soften, become supple. The body is resting, I don’t want to think, do something. If this is done constantly, then the muscles stop working, begin to atrophy. It's the same with the brain. Why do we need an inquisitive mind, if everything is already clearly laid out on the shelves? You turn into a programmed robot that repeats what was put into its head with the help of radio, television and the Internet. I don’t want to think for myself, let alone prove my point of view.

Remember when was your most productive period. When did you want to live, create and learn something new? I can bet that the times were not terrible - either student years, or a difficult financial situation, with no visible prospects, or extreme situations that life pushed into and it seemed that there was no way out of them.

At such moments, the body mobilizes forces, the brain is looking for solutions, it is constantly at work, neural connections are strengthened. And for you, although it’s very hard and you don’t understand at that moment why all this is necessary, later come to the conclusion that if it weren’t for an accident / crisis / illness / separation, then the person you are now would not have come out of you .

There is only one conclusion - a person needs shaking so that he does not drown in a quagmire, but lives a full life.

Danger two

The most important goal in life is getting further and further away. And time goes by and it's getting scarier to start implementing it. And then you come to the conclusion that, well, her, this goal. I'm fine as it is.

So it turns out that most people dream of meeting the dawn in the Himalayas, drinking a cup of coffee on the Eiffel Tower or inspecting a sunken ship, while they themselves sit on the fifth point exactly and put it off, put it off, put it off…

Danger three

You will never know who you are and why you came into this world if the comfort zone swallows you up. You will live a boring monotonous life, where the greatest event will be a 30% salary increase or a lucky purchase of a plasma TV with a 25% discount.

Do you want that? I'm sure not. Then it's time to look for a solution. Get out of your comfort zone and look for a way out of it.

There are several ways, and they are not as difficult as you might think. The main thing is that you must make a firm decision to change your life and begin to put this decision into practice. Daily, no reservations. It will be hard for the first couple of weeks, and then a new interesting world will open up for you. You will make new acquaintances, it is likely that you will meet love, define your goals and begin to move towards them. Leaving your comfort zone is your only chance to turn the course of your destiny in the direction you need. Ready? Then let's start.

Method one

Every day, overpowering yourself, do something that you have never done before. Didn't walk to work? Get up an hour earlier and go. At least half way. Didn't recharge? It's time to start with at least five minutes of waving your legs and arms. Didn't read books at night? What's stopping you from trying? No need to go to extremes. Pick one thing and start implementing it into your life. Gradually, little by little. In this case, the main thing is constancy, not volumes and speed.

Method two

Think about what you would like to do? Maybe draw? Or swim? Or martial arts? What about dancing? Aeromodelling? And do not say that there is no time. If you want, you will find an extra hour in order to finally start doing what your soul has long been drawn to.

Method three

Take a vacation, put your family before the fact. And go on a journey. It doesn't have to be far and long. Enough for three to five days in the nearest city. And there, see all the possible sights, try the local gastronomy, visit clubs and cinemas. You will return a renewed person, that's for sure.

Method four

Change your image. Review your wardrobe. Maybe you should add bright accents or, on the contrary, a little classic? No one forces you to change your image for good, but for half a month or a month it is quite normal and enough for you to look at the world with different eyes and make other people change their mind about you.

These are the main milestones on the way out of the comfort zone. Remember that the main thing is not speed, but constancy. You should do at least something every day that is unusual for you, causes fear or inconvenience.

Now you know the most important thing about the comfort zone and how to get out of it. Good luck with this!

Throughout our conscious life, we are faced with the need to change something, make some important decisions, but we are hindered by fear of the unknown. We begin to convince ourselves that everything is not entirely bad, and it is not known whether it will be better there ... We are afraid to seriously change something.

What is a comfort zone in psychology?

There are boundaries within us within which we feel good and safe. It is precisely these internal frameworks that force us to grab onto those relationships that have long outlived their usefulness, for positions and jobs that are not only uninteresting to us, but also do not bring a normal income.

These inner boundaries create a comfort zone. Let's see what it is?

The comfort zone in psychology is the area of our living space that gives us a sense of security. Usually it is determined by habitual behavior, comfortable is what you are used to. Good in a world where everything is stable, familiar and predictable.

In fact, this is the state in which we feel comfortable. It would seem, well, what's wrong with that? Of course, nothing. In addition, it greatly hinders the development of something new, unknown.

To achieve something and do something, you need to get out of your comfort zone. Learning is always associated with going beyond its boundaries.

Beyond the comfort zone is the risk zone. A prerequisite for the development of personality is to go beyond the boundaries of comfort.

Usually young people are more willing to expand their comfort zone. If an ordinary person lingers in it for too long and does not do anything to expand it, then personal development stops there, degradation begins.

Such a definition gives a clear understanding that if we are interested in development, then we will inevitably have to overcome these boundaries.

How to determine the situation of being in the comfort zone for too long?

First, let's figure out how we can tell if we're overly stuck in our comfort zone. You will understand this by your own reaction to some new situation or circumstances. Perhaps you have just thought about it, but it already causes fear in you. I would like to note that the first reaction can be very different: anxiety, stress, fear, curiosity, interest. However, it is fear that is an indicator that the comfort zone is convenient for you - you do not want to leave it.

However, in order to expand your zone, you need to accept everything new and adapt to it.

Awareness

Psychologists say that life begins exactly where the comfort zone ends. To get out of it, you need to understand that you have been there for too long, as if hanging in this state. Until we ourselves recognize this fact, we will not be able to move anywhere. The important point is the very acceptance of this thought. There must also be a desire, an understanding that you just need to get out of this situation.

The comfort zone in psychology covers absolutely all spheres of life. It can be relationships that do not suit us, business, unnecessary and unloved work, home, city. All this is in our familiar zone, but it does not suit us for a long time, however, being afraid of change, we sit and do nothing in order to change something in our lives.

What is a comfort zone and how to get out of it so as not to harm yourself?

Realizing that we are stuck in one place, we need to act. The list of steps to be taken can be conditionally called a program of action. It is needed primarily in order to gently move from one state to another.

The first step is a challenge

The first step in overcoming internal boundaries will be the very process of setting the task. We must decide what we want to achieve, what result we need.

Suppose we realized that we are afraid and uncomfortable to get acquainted with a new environment of people. So, we will need to communicate with strangers as often as possible. This will be our task. The process should become more familiar, and therefore more comfortable.

The second step is the volume of the planned result

At this stage, it is necessary to formulate the volume of the planned result. These should be quite specific figures: what and how much I want to receive, by what date. As a rule, this is an expert assessment of oneself. If you formulate an ORM, it will help you to cope with the work more effectively.

How do we know if our comfort zone has expanded? Naturally, the criterion for success will be your peace of mind when making new acquaintances. In this case, the volume can be formulated as the number of new people in the environment. And at the same time, we denote the number of acquaintances per day. In general, it is logical to gradually increase volumes within reasonable limits. Even if all this does not immediately lead to a comfortable state, there will still be a positive effect.

The biggest trick in this case is that your attention is switched to doing a certain job, you do not focus on the very process of getting out of the settled state. The comfort zone is something to work on, it will not come by itself.

The third step is work

Work is nothing more than a gradual passage of all the planned steps. First of all, we have planned a program of activities for each day, our task is to follow the intended path. It will be good if you write reports on your daily activities, while analyzing the result and the process itself.

Fourth step - and work again

Yes Yes. We were not mistaken ... Again, work.

I would like to point out two points. Firstly, in order to expand the comfort zone, you must definitely work.

Secondly, it should be carried out consistently with a gradual increase in volume. This should not be forgotten.

Knowing what a comfort zone is and how to get out of it, people often make attempts to immediately jump over the stage they want to reach. And for some, it can even succeed, but for the greater mass it will end up with them not leaving the comfortable state at all, being afraid of mistakes. That is why it is important to gradually adapt to the new expanded zone.

A new habit, as a rule, is fixed exactly twenty-one days. Learning something new is also a kind of zone expansion.

We must make sure that we feel comfortable in an ever-increasing volume, then we will not run the risk of destroying absolutely all the results of our labors. Every step should be comfortable.

Fifth step - development of new territory

At this stage, the comfort zone is a new territory that has already been mastered. You can relax and enjoy life. Not forgetting that new territories and victories lie ahead.

Exercises and training

If a person is afraid of something, then he must certainly do it, this is the opinion of many psychologists. Having determined what a comfort zone is, and once expanding it, we must develop the habit and ability to correctly get out of it in any situation. And for this you need to overcome the fear of something new.

There are special exercises for these purposes:

You need to start by changing the usual little things. For example, change the schedule of the day, take a different route, shop at a new store, purchase unusual products.
Meeting a new person is a great way out of a comfortable state.
Then you can learn something that you did not know before. Embroider, knit, cook a new dish, play the guitar.
Watch a movie or read a book in a genre uncharacteristic for you.
Go on an unplanned trip, everything should be impromptu, without any prior preparations. You will get a lot of new impressions, and expand your comfort zone.
Visit a new location. For example, a new restaurant with unusual cuisine for you.
Put on new things, those that you would not dare to wear before. It can be extraordinary styles, colors.
Then you can do the rearrangement of furniture. Refresh your room with a new interior.
Take a ride in a minibus on a previously unfamiliar path.
And finally, come up with your simulators - situations.

Brian Tracy

In psychology, the name of Brian Tracy is widely known. He is considered the world's expert in success. He developed his own system for achieving it, and did it at the age of twenty-five. Since then, Tracy has written many books on psychology. He continues to work at the present time, conducting trainings and consultations.

What else is Brian Tracy famous for? The comfort zone is one of the topics he has worked on. His book Get Out of Your Comfort Zone is all about this topic. In it, he talks about twenty-one ways to increase personal effectiveness. Certainly, his work deserves attention.

Instead of an afterword

Speaking about the comfort zone, they do not mean those external circumstances that are convenient for a person, but they mean internal life boundaries, existing in which people feel safe. Sofa, massage, coffee give a feeling of comfort for one person, and another who is not used to it can be taken out of the calm zone. All these things are foreign to him.

Being comfortable isn't always helpful. People tend to get bogged down in unnecessary circumstances and relationships, but they, out of habit, feel quite comfortable and do not risk changing something in their lives, fearing that these changes will not lead to anything good.

Beyond the boundaries of the comfort zone is a zone of risk, possible trials and dangers. Not everyone is consciously ready to leave the usual comfort and get into unpleasant conditions. However, only in this way can a person develop. He certainly needs to periodically leave the comfort zone, he just needs to learn how to do it right, without harming himself. Gradually expanding the zone for himself, he will certainly be in it. You can't be uncomfortable all the time. Having learned to adapt, a person is easier to master new areas of activity. Getting out of the comfort zone is useful, it is a kind of shake-up and an incentive for further action and development.