Important features of speech etiquette. Speech etiquette - rules of polite communication

It is vital for any person to know good manners. The norm of behavior should be the manifestation of good manners. A cultured person is obliged to know the rules of etiquette and observe them. The ability to present yourself, as well as make a good impression, will give you the opportunity to gain confidence and feel comfortable in absolutely any society.
What is speech etiquette? Speech etiquette - rules of polite communication and speech behavior. The ability to master speech etiquette helps to achieve authority, trust and self-respect. The constant use of speech etiquette in a business community leaves a positive impression of the organization on partners and clients and accumulates a positive reputation.

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Photo gallery: Speech etiquette - rules of polite communication

Greetings.

When meeting, you should say hello not only to someone you know, but also to someone you don’t know, if you need to contact this person with some request or question. Certain rules of communication and norms of etiquette exist not only in relation to the forms of greetings, but also to the conditions under which it is more appropriate to use one or another form.

Usually the first to greet:

• man - woman;

• younger - older;

• a younger woman - an older one, as well as an older man;

• junior employees - senior employees;

• latecomer - waiting;

• the one who enters the room - those already present;

• the one who passes - the one standing;

• passing by - overtaking.

Under the same conditions, the more polite person greets first.

A woman entering a room with guests already gathered there must be the first to greet those present, without waiting for the men to greet her. In the meantime, men should not wait for a woman to come up to them and say hello. It will be better if the men themselves rise up and meet her halfway.

If a person enters a room where there are guests invited by the owner, it is necessary to greet all the guests at once or each of those present separately. Approaching the table, a person must greet those present and again greet each of his neighbors at the table, sitting down in his place. Moreover, in both the first and second cases, it is not necessary to shake hands.

When greeting a lady, as well as a person of senior status or age, a seated man must stand up. If he greets people passing by with whom he does not intend to talk, the man may not stand up, but only sit up.

At formal receptions, the host or hostess is greeted first, then the ladies, first the older ones, then the younger ones; after - more senior men, and only then the rest of the guests. The host and hostess must shake hands with all guests invited to their home.

If there are married couples at the reception, then the women greet each other first, then the men greet them, and only then the men greet each other.

A woman walking with a man greets a woman walking or standing alone first. If you are standing with someone and your companion greets a stranger, you need to greet him too. If you meet someone you know in the company of a stranger, you need to say hello to both of them. It is also necessary to greet everyone in the group you approach.

Performance.

There are a number of rules of polite communication that must be followed when meeting people and making introductions. A man, no matter what age or position, is always the first to introduce himself to a woman. Younger women and men should be introduced to those who are more senior in age (as well as by official position), and to a familiar person - to a less familiar one (provided that they are of the same gender and age). If two people have the same position, then the younger one should be introduced to the older one, the subordinate to the boss, if there is only one person, then he is introduced to the couple or a whole group, society, the woman should also be the first to be introduced to the married couple. In this case, you first need to say the name of the person introducing yourself. You can’t just bring people up to each other and say, “Get to know each other.” It is rude to force people to identify themselves.

If a man sits while being introduced, he must stand. A woman does not have to stand up, except for those moments when she is introduced to an older lady (or position). After introductions, people should exchange greetings or, more likely, handshakes. The first person to extend his hand is the one to whom they are introducing themselves. Giving a couple of fingers or their tips instead of a hand is impolite. If a lady or a person senior in rank or age does not shake hands, you need to bow slightly.

Conducting a conversation.

The tone of the conversation should be absolutely natural, continuous, smooth, but in no case meticulous and playful, this means that you need to be knowledgeable, but not pedantic, cheerful, but you should not make noise, you need to be polite, but you cannot exaggerate politeness .

In “high society”, communication etiquette allows you to talk about everything, but you cannot delve into anything. When talking, all serious polemics should be avoided, especially when talking about religion and politics.

An equally necessary condition for a well-mannered and polite person is the ability to listen. If you know how to listen carefully to a story without interrupting the narrator, and be able to show your interest in the place with questions like: “And what happened next? "," This is incredible! How could this happen? ”, “And how did you deal with this? ”, then any person will be pleased to talk with you.

Do not try to overwhelm your interlocutor with erudition. Nobody wants to feel stupider than others. But if you don’t know about something, don’t be shy to talk about it. Most people like to talk about something that their interlocutors do not know.

In society, you cannot start talking about yourself until you are specifically asked to do so. But even in this situation, you need to be modest and not overestimate yourself and your capabilities.

You should not talk at a long distance, as this will attract the attention of people around you, but you should not communicate “closely”.

Speech etiquette and its role in everyday and professional spheres

Speech etiquette- a set of requirements for the form, content, order, nature and situational relevance of statements accepted in a given culture. Well-known researcher of speech etiquette N.I. Formanovskaya gives the following definition: “Speech etiquette is understood as the regulating rules of speech behavior, a system of nationally specific stereotypical, stable communication formulas accepted and prescribed by society to establish contact between interlocutors, maintain and interrupt contact in the chosen tonality.”

Speech etiquette, in particular, includes words and expressions used by people to say goodbye, requests, apologies, forms of address accepted in various situations, intonation features that characterize polite speech, etc.

Possession of speech etiquette contributes to the acquisition of authority, generates trust and respect. Knowing the rules of speech etiquette and observing them allows a person to feel confident and at ease, not experience embarrassment due to mistakes and incorrect actions, and avoid ridicule from others.

Compliance with speech etiquette by officials of all ranks, doctors, lawyers, sellers, communications workers, transport workers, and law enforcement officers also has an educational value and involuntarily contributes to improving both the speech and general culture of society.

But the most important thing is that strict adherence to the rules of speech etiquette by members of the staff of a particular educational institution, enterprise, production, office creates a favorable impression on the founders and partners and maintains the positive reputation of the entire organization.

Etiquette is closely related to ethics, the moral foundations of human interaction. It contributes to the development of a person’s attitude towards other people, towards elders, younger ones, towards relatives, towards colleagues, towards parents, towards children, towards women, towards business partners, towards society, the state, as well as towards nature, towards everything that is called the environment environment.

Principles and postulates of speech etiquette.

In the broad sense of the word, speech etiquette characterizes almost any successful act of communication. The success of communication depends on the attitude of the interlocutors towards each other, on respect for the interlocutor, on the mutual desire to avoid various kinds of interference during communication. In other words, from compliance principle of cooperation . This principle is considered basic with the principle of communication.

G.P. Grice (1975) formulated three basic postulates that are derived from the principle of cooperation underlying all communication.

The postulates of verbal communication include:

postulates of quality (the message should not be false or unfounded),

Violation of one or more of these postulates to one degree or another entails a communicative failure.

Another important principle that governs the communication process is principle of politeness, formulated by J. Leach. The principle of Politeness is an integral part of the communication code. This principle is aimed at preventing conflict situations. Following the principle of politeness creates an environment of positive interaction. This principle ensures the implementation of communication strategies, where indirect (indirect) formulations play a huge role, in other words, the use of “implying techniques.” This type of technique is used by communicators in order not to make it difficult for the interlocutor.

Politeness requirements are especially significant for messages that have the function of establishing interpersonal contacts, attracting listeners to one’s side, etc. In the case of simple transfer of information, the principle of politeness is important, but is relegated to the background.

The principle of Politeness is concretized in certain norms and maxims:

Sphere of speech etiquette

The scope of speech etiquette extends to everyday communication, in which certain rules of behavior are formed in relation to parents, close people, relatives, and neighbors. Speech etiquette is formed in the sphere of public relations and the sphere of professional activity of people. If there are general rules of etiquette, rules for each of these areas are also formed.

The sphere of speech etiquette includes, in particular, ways of expressing sympathy, complaints, guilt, grief, etc., accepted in a given culture. For example, in some cultures it is customary to complain about difficulties and problems, in others it is not customary. In some cultures, talking about your successes is acceptable, in others it is not at all. This may also include specific instructions of speech etiquette - what can serve as a subject of conversation, what cannot, and in what situation.

Everyday language practice and norms in speech etiquette.

The specificity of speech etiquette is that it characterizes both everyday language practice and the language norm. Indeed, elements of speech etiquette are present in the everyday practice of any native speaker (including those with poor command of the norm), who easily recognizes these formulas in the flow of speech and expects their interlocutor to use them in certain situations. Elements of speech etiquette are absorbed so deeply that they are perceived by the “naive” linguistic consciousness as part of the everyday, natural and logical behavior of people. Ignorance of the requirements of speech etiquette and, as a consequence, failure to comply with them (for example, addressing an adult stranger as “You”) is perceived as a desire to offend or as bad manners.

On the other hand, speech etiquette can be considered from the point of view of linguistic norms. Thus, the idea of ​​correct, cultural, standardized speech also includes certain ideas of the norm in the field of speech etiquette. For example, every native speaker knows the formulas for apologizing for awkwardness; however, the norm welcomes some (Excuse me, I ask for forgiveness) - and rejects or does not recommend others, for example, I apologize (and sometimes “justifications” are given to such a distinction, such as: you cannot apologize to yourself, you can only ask for an apology from others, etc.). The very use or non-use of units of speech etiquette can also be the subject of normalization, for example: apology formulas are appropriate if the speaker is causing concern to his interlocutor, but one should not apologize too often, since this puts the interlocutor in an awkward position, etc. In addition, violation norms and rules of the literary language, especially if it looks like negligence, can in itself be considered a violation of speech etiquette.

Speech etiquette and speech situation.

Speech etiquette is determined by the situation in which communication occurs. This could be a college anniversary, graduation party, initiation into the profession, presentation, scientific conference, meeting, hiring and firing, business negotiations, conversation between doctor and patient, etc.

Speech etiquette is one way or another tied to the parameters of the communication situation: the personalities of the interlocutors, the topic, place, time, motive and purpose of communication. First of all, it represents a complex of linguistic phenomena focused on the addressee, although the personality of the speaker (or writer) is also taken into account. This can best be demonstrated by the use of You and You forms in communication. The general principle is that you forms are used as a sign of respect and greater formality of communication; You-forms, on the contrary, correspond to informal communication between equals. However, the implementation of this principle may appear in different versions, depending on how the participants in verbal communication are related by age and/or service hierarchy, whether they are in family or friendly relationships; on the age and social status of each of them, etc.

Speech etiquette also reveals itself differently depending on the topic, place, time, motive and purpose of communication. So, for example, the rules of verbal communication may differ depending on whether the topic of communication is sad or joyful events for the participants in the communication; There are specific etiquette rules associated with the place of communication (feast, public place, production meeting), etc.

The connection between speech etiquette and the social status of communication participants and their roles

The phenomena of speech etiquette vary depending on the social status of the participants in communication. These differences manifest themselves in several ways.

Various units of speech etiquette are used depending on the social roles assumed by the participants in communication. Here, both the social roles themselves and their relative position in the social hierarchy are important. When communicating between two students; between student and teacher; between superior and subordinate; between spouses; between parents and children - in each individual case, etiquette requirements can be very different. Some units are replaced by others, functionally homogeneous, but stylistically opposed. So, in the listed situations, different greeting formulas may be appropriate: Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Ivan Ivanovich. Other units of speech etiquette are mandatory in some cases and optional in others. For example, when calling on the phone at an inopportune time, you need to apologize for the disturbance, you just shouldn’t apologize when calling on the phone, however, if it is not the recipient of the call who answers the phone, but a stranger, especially if he is older, it would also be appropriate to apologize for the disturbance, etc. .d.

The connection between speech etiquette and social groups of interlocutors

These aspects of speech behavior are also influenced by differences in the use of units of speech etiquette among representatives of different social groups. Many specialized units and general manifestations of speech etiquette differ in their stable attachment to certain social groups of language speakers.

Communicative functions of speech etiquette.

Speech etiquette:

Linguistic means of speech etiquette

Speech etiquette in the narrow sense of the word can be characterized as a system of linguistic means in which etiquette relations are manifested. Elements of this system can be implemented at different language levels:

At the level of vocabulary and phraseology: special words and fixed expressions (Thank you, Please, I beg your pardon, Excuse me, Goodbye, etc.), as well as specialized forms of address (Mr., Comrade, etc.).

At the grammatical level: use of the plural for polite address (including the pronoun you); using interrogative sentences instead of imperative sentences (Can you tell me what time it is? Could you move a little? etc.).

At the stylistic level: the requirement of competent, cultural speech; refusal to use words that directly name obscene and shocking objects and phenomena, using euphemisms instead of these words.

At the intonation level: the use of polite intonation (for example, the phrase Please, close the door can sound with different intonation depending on whether it implies a polite request or an unceremonious demand).

At the level of orthoepy: using Hello instead of Hello, Please instead of Please, etc.

Speech etiquette is implemented both in the characteristics of speech in general and in specialized units. These units - formulas of greeting, farewell, apology, request, etc. - as a rule, are performatives (i.e. statements, the utterance of which simultaneously means the commission of the named action;). Indeed, the phrases “I apologize”, “Thank you”, “I ask you”, etc. do not describe actions, but are themselves actions - respectively, an apology, an expression of gratitude, a request, etc.

Stylistic differences in the use of speech etiquette units are largely determined by the belonging of speech to various functional styles. In fact, each functional style has its own etiquette rules. For example, business speech is characterized by a high degree of formality: the participants in communication, the persons and objects in question are called by their full official names. In scientific speech, a rather complex system of etiquette requirements is adopted that determines the order of presentation, references to predecessors and objections to opponents (somewhat archaic manifestations of scientific speech etiquette undoubtedly include We-forms: Above we have already shown ... - including on behalf of one author) . In addition, different functional styles may correspond to special forms of address (for example, the Colleague address in scientific speech).

Etiquette also includes prohibitions. Prohibitions on the use of obscene and shocking words and expressions may be combined with recommendations or instructions to replace them with euphemisms. This applies to actually obscene words and expressions and those that too directly name objects and phenomena that it is not customary to talk about directly in a given culture. The same expressions may be considered prohibited in some groups and acceptable in others. In the same group, the use of swear words may be considered acceptable, or at least excusable; however, the severity of the prohibition increases sharply in the presence of women, children, in conditions of official and diplomatic communication, etc.

Nonverbal aspects of speech etiquette.

In addition to intonation, oral speech is distinguished from written speech by the use of non-verbal means - gestures and facial expressions. From the point of view of speech etiquette, the following paralinguistic signs are distinguished:

At the same time, the regulation of gestures and facial expressions covers not only the last two categories of signs, but also signs of a non-etiquette nature - up to purely informative ones; cf., for example, the etiquette prohibition of pointing a finger at the subject of speech.

However, it is hardly possible to determine which intonation corresponds to speech etiquette and which goes beyond it, in general terms, without taking into account the specific speech situation. Thus, in Russian speech there are (following E.A. Bryzgunova) seven main “intonation structures” (i.e. types of phrasal intonation). Pronouncing the same utterance with different intonation (accordingly, the implementation of different intonation structures) expresses different oppositions: in meaning, in actual division, in stylistic shades, and including in expressing the attitude of the speaker to the listener. This relationship determines which intonation structure should be used in a given case and which should not. Thus, in accordance with etiquette rules, intonation should not indicate a dismissive or patronizing attitude, an intention to lecture the interlocutor, aggression or challenge. This is especially true for various kinds of interrogative statements. For example, the same question: Where were you last night? - allows for different intonation depending on who and by whom this question is addressed: the boss - the subordinate, the representative of the investigative authorities - the suspect; one friend to another; one interlocutor to another during a small talk “about nothing”, etc.

Rules of speech etiquette in everyday life and professional environment

There are special rules for conducting dialogue for the speaker and for the listener, the so-called speech etiquette.

Thus, interlocutors are prescribed a friendly attitude towards each other. It is prohibited to cause damage to your partner with your speech: insult, insult, neglect; you cannot express direct negative assessments. The main psychological requirement of speech etiquette is, undoubtedly, the principle of “do no harm.”

In a conversation, it is necessary to take into account the social status, gender and age of the interlocutor, and the communication situation.

The speaker is not recommended to put his own “I” in the center of attention; he should be able to take the position of a partner, he should not put pressure on the interlocutor, or turn the dialogue into a monologue. Accordingly, the listener must push his “I” into the background and turn on empathic listening.

Both the speaker and the listener, having placed the other at the center of their attention, must take into account the personality of the other, his awareness of the topic, the degree of interest, and constantly maintain contact using non-verbal means (through facial expressions, gestures, glances). The listener should signal to the partner by assenting, nodding his head, and facial expressions about his attention and interest.

The interlocutors must take turns passing the initiative in the dialogue, and be able to tactfully but firmly take the initiative into their own hands if the partner gets carried away or deliberately seizes the right to monologue.

In communication, the choice of distance is important. Partners must take into account the distance accepted in a given national culture, which is acceptable for different types of communication. Speakers are required to choose the degree of freedom of behavior depending on the conditions of communication and the national composition of the participants. An excessively loud voice and waving your arms in front of your interlocutor's face are unlikely to promote communication.

The speaker must follow the logic of text development, maintain the topic of conversation, and not jump from one thing to another. The listener is also obliged not to lose the thread of the conversation, not to be distracted from the subject of the conversation and avoid passing digressions, not to be irritated by the specific qualities of the speaker, to separate the person from the problem so as not to miss valuable information if the person is somehow unpleasant to the listener.

The listener needs to show the speaker that he is ready to listen. You need to look and act interested. When listening, you should try to understand, and not look for reasons for irritation. Make it easier for your interlocutor to give a positive answer. You should avoid asking questions to which your interlocutor can answer “no.”

Interlocutors must remember that the threshold of semantic perception and concentration of attention is limited. The speaking time without a pause can last from 45 seconds to 1.5 minutes, and the most favorable length of an oral utterance is seven semantic units +2.

Interlocutors must select linguistic means, keeping in mind the relevance, accessibility, accuracy, logic, expressiveness as communicative qualities of speech.

Both the speaker and the listener must control not only their thoughts, but also their feelings: if they are overwhelmed by emotions, communication is unlikely to be productive, and an angry person attaches the wrong meaning to the words of the other.

Information sources:

1. Golub I.B., Neklyudov V.D. Russian rhetoric and speech culture. Textbook allowance. – M: Logos, 2011.// EBS “University Library on-line” http://www.biblioclub.ru/

2. Golubev V. L. Rhetoric. Answers to exam questions. - Minsk: TetraSystems, 2008 / University Library on-line

3. Annushkin V.I. Rhetoric. Introductory course. Tutorial. - M.: Flinta, 2011 / University Library on-line

7.2. Block of additional information and Internet resources.

4. Mikhalskaya A.K. Rhetoric. 10-11 grades Basic level: textbook - M.: Bustard, 2013.

5. Grinko E.N. “Rhetoric and rhetorical culture: history and theory” - Vladivostok, Far Eastern State Technical University, 2004 (traditional and electronic version)

Standards of answers to tasks for self-control.

1.What is speech etiquette?

Speech etiquette refers to the regulating rules of speech behavior, a system of nationally specific stereotypical, stable communication formulas accepted and prescribed by society to establish contact between interlocutors, maintain and interrupt contact in the chosen tonality (N.I. Formanovskaya).

2.What is official, professional etiquette?

Business (professional) etiquette regulates the behavior of people related to the performance of their official duties. Among business (professional) etiquette, the most strict is diplomatic.

3. What is informal (secular) etiquette?

Unofficial (secular) etiquette regulates communication in the sphere of leisure and satisfaction of material and spiritual needs.

What are the principles of speech etiquette?

There are two of them - the principle of cooperation and the principle of politeness.

What are the postulates of speech etiquette that implement the principle of cooperation?

The postulates of speech communication include the following postulates:

quality (the message must not be false or unfounded),

quantity (the message should be neither too short nor too long), relationship (the message should be relevant to the recipient) and

method (the message must be clear, precise, not contain words and expressions that are incomprehensible to the addressee, etc.).

6. What norms specify the principle of Politeness?

The principle of Politeness is concretized in certain norms:

Politeness: friendliness, goodwill, respect, desire to observe the rules of decency.

Tactfulness: delicacy, restraint, the ability to behave with tact, respecting others, a sense of proportion in words, behavior, and actions.

Commitment: punctuality, accuracy, accuracy, responsibility, the desire to always provide assistance, be attentive to people and true to your own word.

Modesty - restraint in assessing one’s own person, one’s merits, lack of boastfulness, moderation.

Dignity is a set of high moral qualities, respect for them in oneself.

7. In what areas does speech etiquette manifest itself?

The sphere of speech etiquette includes the etiquette of addresses, greetings, farewells and introductions. The sphere of speech etiquette also includes forms of expressing requests, gratitude, and apologies. The sphere of speech etiquette includes, in particular, ways of expressing sympathy, complaints, guilt, grief, etc., accepted in a given culture. This may also include specific instructions of speech etiquette - what can serve as a subject of conversation, what cannot, and in what situation.

8. What are the linguistic means of speech etiquette at different language levels?

At the level of vocabulary and phraseology: special words and set expressions

At the grammatical level: use of the plural for polite address (including the pronoun you);

At the stylistic level: the requirement of competent, cultural speech, etc. ;

At the intonation level: use of polite intonation, etc.

At the organizational and communicative level: a ban on interrupting the interlocutor, interfering in someone else’s conversation, etc.

9. How are speech etiquette and situations of verbal communication related?

Speech etiquette is one way or another tied to the situation of verbal communication and its parameters: the personalities of the interlocutors, the topic, place, time, motive and purpose of communication.

10. How are the communicative functions of speech etiquette manifested?

Speech etiquette:

promotes the establishment of contact between interlocutors;

attracts the attention of the listener (reader), distinguishes him from other potential interlocutors;

allows you to show respect;

helps determine the status of ongoing communication (friendly, business, official, etc.);

creates a favorable emotional environment for communication and has a positive impact on the listener (reader).

11. How are speech etiquette and the social status of communication participants related? Roles of communication participants?

12. What is the connection between speech etiquette and the interlocutors’ belonging to social groups?

Various units of speech etiquette are used depending on the social roles assumed by the participants in communication.

Many specialized units and general manifestations of speech etiquette differ in their stable attachment to certain social groups of language speakers.

These groups can be distinguished according to the following criteria:

age: speech etiquette formulas associated with youth slang (Ale, Chao, Goodbye); specific forms of politeness in the speech of older people (Thank you, Do me a favor);

education and upbringing: more educated and well-mannered people tend to use units of speech etiquette more accurately, use V-forms more widely, etc.;

gender: women, on average, gravitate towards more polite speech, are less likely to use rude, abusive and obscene language, and are more scrupulous in choosing topics;

belonging to specific professional groups.

13. What are the etiquette requirements for the intonation of a statement?

Among the etiquette requirements for oral speech, the intonation of the statement occupies an important place. A native speaker accurately identifies all range of intonations - from emphatically polite to dismissive. However, it is hardly possible to determine which intonation corresponds to speech etiquette and which goes beyond it, in general terms, without taking into account the specific speech situation.

14. What nonverbal aspects of speech etiquette can you name?

From the point of view of speech etiquette, the following non-verbal, paralinguistic signs are distinguished:

not carrying a specific etiquette load (duplicating or replacing segments of speech - indicating, expressing agreement and denial, emotions, etc.);

required by etiquette rules (bows, handshakes, etc.);

having an invective, offensive meaning.

15. What is the basic rule of speech etiquette in a professional environment?

It is prohibited to cause damage to your partner with your speech: insult, insult, neglect. Do no harm.